"Happy birthday! Look what I got you," Boyfriend exclaims, waving the unwrapped pan around. "It was on sale," he adds, oblivious to my 'I can't believe you got me a frying pan for my birthday' look.
"Uh...thanks," I say packing the pan away.
"Don't put it away yet, we can use it tonight."
"You mean, I can use it tonight to cook you something." My sarcasm falls on deaf ears.
"Yeah, I got some salmon steaks to celebrate."
I picture a big fat dent in the shape of a frying pan on Boyfriend's head. I pack the pan away, just in case I give in to the temptation to use Boyfriend's head as batting practice. I count to 10 slowly, before saying, "It's my birthday, why don't you cook me something instead."
Boyfriend finally realises that I'm not as enamoured with the non-stick frying pan as he is, "It's a fantastic pan. You never have to scrub ever again!"
I give him 'the look'.
"Okay, I'll take you out to dinner instead," he grumbles.
A few months later for his 26th birthday I inform Boyfriend that his present was a pair of binoculars.
"Where is it?" he asks.
"I haven't bought it yet."
"I've been busy."
"But you work only a few doors down from the store."
"Okay, you'll get them next week," I promise.
Months passed. Boyfriend waited.
"Guess what!" Boyfriend shouts from the doorway one afternoon.
"What?" I reply.
"Happy birthday to me," Boyfriend sings, entering the room with a pair of binoculars hanging from his neck.
I giggle guiltily. I had forgotten about his birthday present.